The Houseparent Network

The Webmaster Speaks (written in 2001)

I received an E-mail from a director of a facility that has really got me thinking. I have been in child care for some time and I know how difficult it is to recruit quality staff. Hence, one of the main reasons I started this website. Anyway, I offered to this director free advertising for his facility and to offer my website as a free resource for recruiting staff.

Rather than accept my offer or politely decline, he chose to insult me. I quote, "there seems to be some bitterness in your tone toward administrators; you sound like a frustrated houseparent who has somehow earned the right to be an administrator, but lacks the opportunity to be one, Lord willing, you may get your chance to "shine", but count the cost (if you are able)!!" I am sure he is referring to my "What Every Houseparent Needs to Know" articles. This got me to think, if he feels that way maybe others do also, so I would like to clarify what my feelings really are:

1. I have nothing but the highest respect for the vast majority of administrators. They have a most difficult job dealing with the children, state regulation, the court system, families of the children, as well as the task of recruiting and training competent staff, and I have no desire to be one.

2. In writing the "What every Houseparent Needs to Know" articles, I was trying to reflect in a humorous way:

Administrators, and it could be said other staff, very much highlight the positives of Houseparenting while down playing the negative when talking to prospective houseparents
Houseparents and Administrators will not agree on every issue in running the house.

3. I am very thankful that this director works at a facility that is so overrun with staff that they didn't need new FREE resources for recruiting, but would prefer to insult those that would offer to help.

For those that are Houseparents or thinking of becoming houseparents and might think my message is somewhat negative, I would like to say this:

Being a houseparent is not an easy job, and anybody that would tell you it is, probably isn't being very truthful.
On the other hand, being a houseparent is a very rewarding and a very needed occupation.

I have seen lives changed. I have seen children that society has written off become useful contributing members of society
I have been able to travel to places, meet people, and do things I would never have been able to do in my previous career as a mechanic.
I have been able to do things with my family that I was unable to do in my previous career. Such as: volunteer at my children's school, go on field trips, play catch with my son in the afternoon, be there when they get home from school, spend the day with my wife doing laundry, drinking coffee, and just talking.

Hopefully the Marines, won't be offended but I would like to use their branch of service as a metaphor for houseparents.

1. They are both very needed occupations - Marines are needed to protect our freedom - Houseparents are needed to protect children that don't have the family support and in some cases families from the children.
2. They are both very demanding occupations. demanding in different ways but demanding none the less.
3. In both occupations it takes a very special person to do them. I would be the first to admit I don't have what it take to be a Marine. I have known many that have not had what it takes to be a houseparent and are very willing to admit it.
4. Finally in both occupations, most people think you are crazy to even want to try it in the first place.

Finally, as a Christian, I would like to say this to other Christians. One last final reason to become a houseparent is this: James 1:27 "Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, To visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction..." In other words care for the orphans and widows.